In my half century and three years of walking the planet, I’ve seen and experienced a lot of things. I consider myself quite a sensitive person, so I tend to react emotionally to a lot of things that I see, hear or experience.

I actually think that is a good thing for a creative person. People tell me to grow a thicker skin or to ignore it, but I can’t do that. If I close myself off to all the noise and experience in the world, then I am likely to miss something important or beautiful.

We all know there are a lot of things that can upset us out there. Primary among these are human relationships. We are complex beasts indeed, and the tangled weave of emotions, thoughts and perceptions that go towards making two people understand each other are indeed something that would challenge even Deep Thought.

I have experienced many hurtful things in my life. From direct physical pain, being ignored by someone, racists taunts in public - you name it, it has happened at one time or another. But here is the thing. I can handle all of the above quite well. I know that often times, it is the manifestation of the other person’s perception that dictates these sorts of actions, and there is nothing that I can do about that. It is completely under their control and influence. Not mine.

However there is one thing that really hurts me deeply. And that is when someone that I care about makes a completely wrong judgement call about me. I mean, I am by no means a perfect person, but I try and lead my life to be a good and upstanding citizen of the planet. My mantra is to always conduct my life in such a way that I can sleep easy at night. It was something taught to me by my father, and I intend to pass that lesson along to my own kids as my legacy.

The problem is that on several occasions, people I have cared deeply about have accused me of completely the opposite of what I am about. These are people who I thought knew me, and knew the way I conduct myself.

It is not that it leads to any self doubt in myself. I am pretty strong in my convictions and principles so virtually nothing can shake that. I think the thing that upsets me the most is that it suddenly seems to open up a yawning chasm between me and the other party. It is as if someone has just cut away the bridge that we walked easily across back and forth for years.

In the past I used to dwell on this for months. Years even. But as I grow older, I think I am realising that these things are also a result of the perceptions and battles that the other person is going through at that time. I have learned to let go a lot more easily now.

No malice. No anger. No reservations. If the other person does not want my friendship, then that is fine. The hurt goes away quicker now. I have many things in my life that bring me joy and that I am grateful for, and I cannot take away my mental time and energy on things that can never be repaired.

I will sleep easy tonight.